Christian Mistress - Agony and Opium (20 Buck Spin, 2010)

Remember when you could go to a party and put on a specific album to find that all the guests coalesce into one small lake of like minded enjoyment? I genuinely feel the band Christian Mistress has this in spades, as their album Agony and Opium (2010, 20 Buck Spin Records) demonstrates a rather focused and streamlined approach to old metal. This however doesn't serve to downplay the musical talent of the group, as the guitarists go through thoughtful leads and solos that bring to mind a combination of Smith/Murray and Friedman/Mustaine. Rallying the fray are the impassioned and serpentine wails of Christine Davis, sounding not too far off from Belgian cult favorites Acid. The question on the mind of most progressive minded metallers is "why care? it's already been done."

A real subject of debate considering the sheer number of retrospective acts emerging in the past 5 years, the question of originality represents the main deal breaker for most listeners. I postulate that many define originality too rigidly. To say Christian Mistress is unoriginal because they base their sound on old metal templates is to say that LHOOQ is unoriginal because it literally started with a copy of the Mona Lisa. The idea of neoclassicism and appropriation has manifested itself in this small (it ain't that big, folks) sector of Rock and Roll music, and bands have thus created works of varying integrity. In this writer's opinion, the cheapest and lowest of the lot, your White Wizzards or Cauldrons attempt to go for a sort of cute and pomp-ridden nostalgia, undermining the work of more thoughtful artists such as Slough Feg, Blackholicus, the newly celebrated Quicksand Dream and the subject of this article. When you stack these releases next to each other, it becomes quite easy to differentiate the cabaret show pretenders and the truly passionate and reverent artists.

I could go into a song by song rundown, but I'll skip all that and say "buy the album." Agony and Opium represents a spectrum of desperate and hungry human emotion, a post industrial defeatist opera of speed and melody. And what music to better represent the wasteland of post industrial society than Heavy Metal? It started with the clanging of the doomed factories on foundation laying vinyl such as Rocka Rolla, and the sad wings still fly, however beaten and bruised. Lyrical mastery in all aspects, each song sings with a palpable regard for punk traveler poetry and some melancholy nights with wine, weed and Leonard Cohen records. The greatest aspect remains that almost everyone in this era of Imperial decline can relate to the experience articulated through each song. The positive aspects of universal appeal have been diluted by the turgid and unimaginative squalor of mainstream media. Christian Mistress totally brings back the vibe of an album you can put on anywhere and most anybody will enjoy it while the recording still oozes musical integrity. I can't remember a single thing like it in the last 10 years.